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It's
been a year since my descent into the pit of evil that is called,
E3. If you have not yet read that harrowing report, click here
to discover the secret that is behind the demonic influences that
surround the most depraved trade show on earth. Only then will you
be prepared for what I'm about to reveal about the "Most Evil
E3 Ever"
Last year I "uncovered" the source
behind the plot that is E3. This year I plan to give you a little
more of a straight account of my visit to what many consider to
be the ultimate game show on earth. E3 is more than that, since
it's designed for retailers and distributors to come and see what
they might want to sell on their store shelves this year. It's also
a place where some hopeful game developers try to connect with a
publisher.
Like last year, I went as a Simutronics representative.
Unlike last year, I didn't get to look around much. In fact, I missed
a great deal. This was due to the heavy meeting schedule we had
to endure (Yes, I considered whether this was an evil Microsoft
plot, but discounted it since I was the one that set up the meetings...stilll...).
I was in charge of the meeting schedule and
while that seems like a minor task, it helped me finally decide
to quit hemming and hawing and just go out and buy a Palm computer.
That would solve all my problems. Right?
Even being so busy with "business,"
I saw quite a bit of the show and some of it was rather interesting.
But the one thing that stuck out in my mind was what I didn't
see at the show.
Akklaim was a no-show, "booth babes"
were scarce and it was almost impossible to find free stuff. One
of the best kept secrets of the previous shows (well not so secret)
is that you get to loot every single game developer and publisher
on the planet of all kinds of useless but free stuff. The only thing
I got this year was a piece of candy from a Korean online game developer.
There were some rumors flying about that
some booths were giving away actual stuff, but I never found them.
The only stuff I saw was from some guys in a van parked outside
throwing T-shirts into a crowd of ravenous trade show attendees.
One look at that feeding frenzy and I decided to watch from the
sidelines. One of our people tried to brave the shark infested waters
and barely escaped. I thought he was a gonner for sure. Others weren't
so fortunate and we left the place with figurative body parts floating
amid a sea of figurative greed.
So, the main lesson here is that when dot
coms go bust, E3 gets cheap. Get with it guys. I need better loot
next year. Ahem! Of course this is probably Microsoft's fault since
only they benefit from such chaos. Next year they will own E3.
While trolling the booths and looking for
signs of loot, I came across a packet of information about what
looked like a id's game. Since I have five kids, I glanced at it
discovered was a Christian game. Yes, I said Christian game. At
E3!
I made it a point to visit their booth. Being
limited in my time I only introduced myself and my desire to review
their game, handed my card to the person at the booth and made a
hasty return to where I was to meet my bosses so we could move on
to our next meeting.
I didn't have a chance to chat about their
game but left my business card and told them of my desire to find
out more (We will have a short preview of their upcomming game next
week). CJ's is a game designed for preteens but they also have an
online clubhouse.
The highlight of the show actually came after
the show was over and I was back in St. Louis. I'd exchanged an
email with the people at CJ's Clubhouse and was expecting a phone
call to talk about their game. I got that call, but it seems that
the nice person at the CJ booth at E3 had taken my business card
and entered it into a contest they were having. I had no idea they
were even having one. Well, it seems I won. And the prize was a
Palm V. I was flabbergasted. It was a good thing I was still hemming
and hawing over which one to buy!
Was it Divine providence or just happenstance
that I won? Well, maybe it was an evil Microsoft conspiracy! Nahh.
God is good and this is a blessing.
One of the few truly exciting things at the
show was watching the Warcraft III and Diablo II expansion trailers.
Big sound, big screen and incredible graphics. I'll be buying those
games just to watch the movie shorts.
The only game I saw that actually made me
stop and pick my jaw up off the ground was id's upcoming remake,
Return to Wolfenstein (They wouldn't let me in to see the Star Wars
Galaxy Online demo, go figure). It's a typically violent game (but
it's against Nazi's and their fiendish creations so it's OK to blast
them into tiny body parts and see blood dripping from the...you
get it, right?) but it looked incredible. This could very well be
the most realistic environments ever created. The detail was fantastic.
For a good rundown of the various games at
the show, check out GameSpot's
great coverage which surprisingly doesn't mention Return to Wolfenstein.
The actually liked the fact that there was no loot to be
found anywhere. They seem to think it's more professional that way.
Heck, this is a entertainment convention. Business is boring.
Microsoft and X box was the biggest presence
at the show. Everyone had X box paper bags for storing all the unavailable
goodies you used to get <wagging finger at the nearest E3 developer
or publisher>. Electronic Arts had the EXACT same booth
as last year. It was even set up exactly like last year. It was
even showing the exact same games. Well, not exactly, there was
the Harry Potter game (tucked away and very badly shown) and the
Sim's expansion which looked a lot like last year's Sim's expansion.
Electronic Arts was showing Madden Football
2001. Hmm, and I thought they weren't going to make any sequels
because it competed with their previous year's games? I think something
stinks in Denmark.
So, what did I take away from the show? What
great lesson did I learn. What great evil did I uncover? Well, it
was simple. When the dot com bubble burst, the budgets for the shows
gets axed. UNFAIR! Maybe next year things will be better and I'll
come back with loads of stuff and the compulsion to buy everything
that's connected to that stuff.
All right, I
admit it. I didn't come away from E3 with any great lesson. I'm
pulling your leg. It was really nice seeing a couple Christian software
booths (the other was Bible software). I'm hopeful that next year
we might see three instead of two. Oh, heck, I'll go hawg wild and
hope for four.
Eric Slick
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